The Boss Baby

A couple of weeks ago Sean and I took our three nephews for the weekend. Brady, our godson, is 5. His little brother Jack is 3. And their cousin Ben is 3 AND A HALF. They’re the best of friends and they idolize their uncle Sean. We were halfway between Build-A-Bear and Fun Haven when Jack spotted a poster for “Baby Boss!” and he didn’t shut up about it for 10 minutes straight. We have very little idea what he actually said but were left with the general impression that he would like to see it.

So that’s what we did on our nephew date this weekend. We borrowed a minivan with three car seats and motored over to their local (only) cineplex. The arcade was popular: Brady played a racing game even though his little legs couldn’t reach the gas\break pedals; Jack played a shooting game even though he couldn’t even reach it without Sean’s assistance; Ben thought a dance game looked interesting until we put the tokens in and he immediately lost interest (and the machine ate the tokens). And that’s BEFORE we even got to the theatre. I stood in line for 3 tiny buckets of popcorn while Sean went to the bathroom to empty 3 tiny bladders. We convinced Jack to get a booster seat but since Brady didn’t need one, Ben didn’t want one, so we watched the theatre seat try to eat him numerous times. Popcorn was spilled.

bossbaby-gallery2-gallery-imageWas The Boss Baby any good? No, not really. Brady’s favourite part was the preview for Captain Underpants. Jack could quote his favourite part directly from the commercial. But listening to them giggle tops even the best movie, so this was an hour and a half that I wouldn’t change for anything.

The movie is about a sweet little family of 3 who’s expecting a new baby, even though 7 (AND A HALF) year old Tim would really rather not. A baby does arrive though – via taxi – but it’s a bit of a shock. While most babies get sent directly to families, a select few get sent up to “upper management” where they drink a special formula to keep them infantile while working feverishly to keep baby stock UP. But tragically, baby stock is falling because: puppies. More and more love is being siphoned off to puppies, so Baby Corp is fighting back. They’ve sent Boss Baby to Tim’s house because his parents work for Pet Co, who are about to unveil a new “forever puppy.” Tim and Boss Baby do not really get along at the start but guess what? Yeah, you know the rest: they dress like Elvis to evade their manny and head to Vegas to save the world. Or something like that. And of course discover that brotherhood is really quite nice. Baby Corp’s baby factory is pretty cute, and when the narrator comments about where babies come from, Ben pipes up with “Where DO babies come from???”

We went out for frozen yogurt afterward, to debrief. Everyone agreed that Ben’s little sister (who’s only 1) is pretty good as babies go, but that at his house, Ben is the boss. Brady and Jack felt that their family’s boss was probably their Mom.

Anyway, I don’t think I would have particularly cared for this movie if I had watched it on my own, but the truth is, any crummy movie can be immensely improved if you watch it with your favourite human beings.

26 thoughts on “The Boss Baby

  1. Often Off Topic

    I wish we could have had a family comedy about you and Sean looking after your three nephews for the day, it sounds like (tiring) fun!
    As for Boss Baby, I’ll probably avoid it for 2-3 years and end up watching it one Sunday night…


  2. tubularsock

    Jay! You spent MONEY for a movie that you are already living in?
    Pretty funny stuff. Tubularsock did wonder about the “tiny buckets of popcorn”. The last movie Tubularsock went to the “small” bag of popcorn was so huge that it could have feed half of India!

    And Tubularsock noticed that the LARGE BUCKET of popcorn could end world hunger in our time!
    Sounds like a horrid film and the baby arrives by taxi? And Tubularsock always thought that fucking stork was bad enough ……… damn!


    1. Jay Post author

      Yeah, the kids combo is just a little cardboard box, it has a drink holder for the fruitopia, and some popcorn, and a tiny little tube of mini M&Ms – none of the kids finished their food, but they all felt special holding and spilling their own.
      $40 for the movie, $32 for the snacks, $5 for the arcade games

      Liked by 1 person

      1. tubularsock

        Yeah, isn’t capitalism great! Only $5 for the arcade ….. you are very lucky!

        But now for the rest of your grandchildren’s lives they will be fearful of taxis coming to the door …….. Tubularsock sees theosophist bill up the “ying-yang”!


  3. Lacey

    Oh this is so great. I do that sometimes when watching stuff with my kids and seeing their funny reactions. I think, “Oh THIS is why bad movies are made.”


  4. mitchteemley

    I love my daughters, but I still have nightmares about watching the Pokรฉmon movie with them. On the other hand, seeing Toy Story with them (three times) is a memory I cherish.


  5. reocochran

    I guess I have to say my older grandkids liked Boss Baby better than the younger ones. Out favorites so far are Trolls, Angry Birds, Storks, Sing and Smurfs, the Lost Valley. We didn’t really like the Zootopia (scary drugs and some bad stereotypes) nor the five senses one. Shoot! Late night and you may know which one I mean. The one thing I liked about Boss Baby was Alec Baldwin. The snarky and sarcastic comments were having my friend and I laugh and crack up.
    I mean the little boy loves his parents singing the Beatles song, “Black bird singing in the dead of night. . .” And he calls it his parents’ song, quick as a wink, Boss baby says, So, I suppose they are McCartney and Lennon? ๐Ÿ˜€


  6. Amy Reese

    What a wonderful movie watching experience you guys had! Popcorn spilled and all. This movie sounds completely bizarre. Kids’ movies usually are. They’re just weird, aren’t they?


  7. sportsattitudes

    Love the last sentence/sentiment. Sometimes seeing a bad movie can be a great experience if you have the right company!


  8. Pingback: Oscar Nominations 2018 | ASSHOLES WATCHING MOVIES

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