Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates

Mike and Dave are real-life brothers who trolled for wedding dates on Craigslist. Spoiler alert: the ad did not net them true love, but it did earn them fame and fortune, so I guess there’s a happy ending in there somewhere.

Now Hollywood’s got hold of this “true story” and they’ve raunched it up to 11. It’s rated R and believe me, that’s a hard R. There were some crude laughs, some I don’t even want to admit to, but there were dozens of scenes that went on for much too long. It’s a thin story mike-and-dave-need-wedding-dateswith paper cut-out dolls instead of characters, both of which provide the sparest of backdrops for a series of lewd sketches that aren’t so much plot-driven as rude one-upmanship.

The movie is determined to check all the boxes: swearing, sex, nudity, drugs. It uses prop genitalia, merkins (a pubic toupee), and cock socks (otherwise known as “modesty pouches”). And it also features the liberal use of butt doubles. Butt doubles for everyone! (well okay, not for Zac Efron, who has yet to see one that’s better than his own). How does one go about hiring said butt double? An agency will send over a big catalogue of butts for Anna Kendrick to look through and she might select several to peruse in person before selecting her butt’s representative. I assume the temptation to upgrade one’s assets would be enormous.

A body double working under Screen Actors Guild guidelines will be paid $795 for a full 8-hour shift, while part-specific models typically get a rate of $445.30. Of course, naked cheeks net double pay, and an “elite butt double” (whatever thKHekcf3at means) can command a much higher figure. And I’m sure Anna Kendrick springs for the premium butt. Wouldn’t you?

In case it’s not obvious, I found researching body double pay rates much more interesting
than Mike and Dave’s antics. And actually, they’re quite upstaged in the movie by their dates. Anna Kendrick and Aubrey Plaza out-bro the bros. That’s not an endorsement, mind you, just a statement of fact: in a competition of who’s downest and dirtiest, the ladies take the crown. They’re like the love children of Amy Schumer and Danny McBride. So, um, score 1 for feminism (she says as she thrusts out her tits) but score 0 for the movie going public.

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15 thoughts on “Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates

  1. Wendell

    I’ve only seen the trailer which looks terrible. It made me think why the hell is Anna Kendrick in this? That’s not because I think she’s some great actress. I don’t, but based on her career to this point, it seems like the sort of movie she would run fast away from, or something an actress does early in her career before better parts came her way. I might see it, but I’ll probably wind up skipping it.

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  2. Sean

    Even at dinner right after the movie, I could not remember any standout parts of this movie. And now, like 6 hours later, there is nothing left. It is like I never even saw it!

    Liked by 3 people

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  3. Brittani

    I really like Adam Devine, that guy is hilarious on Workaholics, so I’d maybe check it out for him, but not on DVD. I’m now more interested in the fact that they used butt doubles. That’s lame. lol

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  4. Christopher

    It sounds like the one redeeming aspect of this film is it provided work to some butt-doubles. And I’m just trying to imagine what an 8-hour shift of being a butt-double must be like. A lot of us spend eight hours a day just sitting on our asses.

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    1. Jay Post author

      Very loosely based! Two numbskull brothers got their 15 seconds of fame when they posted a personal ad to Craigslist looking for wedding dates. The rest is sordid history.

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  5. kmSalvatore

    First I’m hearing of this movie and also all I ever wanted to know about “doubles” lol , yeah I’m gonna bypass this one.
    Thanks Jay, u sure have saved me a bundle

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  6. Liz A.

    Now that you mention it, I do remember seeing a trailer or something for this. And immediately forgetting about it because it looked stupid. I see I was right. (Yes, body doubles are much more interesting than the movie.)

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    1. Jay Post author

      What a weird career though, right? How do you even get into that?

      I dont know if you’ve seen Love Actually but I just remembered the scenes with Martin Freeman where he meets a woman at work – they happen to be stand-ins for porn stars. Yikes.

      Liked by 1 person

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  7. reocochran

    Wow! I was hoping to see and like this goofy movie. I trust you and won’t go.
    I absolutely hated the “Neighbors” movie and was so disappointed in the leading Seth Roger and Rose Byrne. Although I was not expecting much from Zac Efron. Did you see any redeeming factors to “Neighbors?” I haven’t checked what you may think about a follow up yet.
    Enjoy summer openings and so glad to hear and see your Vegas Chronicles! 🙂

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