Monthly Archives: August 2016

Mothers and Daughters

Mothers and daughters: a relationship so often mined by Hollywood that maybe all the diamonds are gone and all that’s left are duds.

This movie is a dud, but not for lack of trying. Susan Sarandon, plus real-life daughter Eva Amurri Martino, and Sharon Stone, and Courteney Cox, and Selma Blair, and Christina Ricci, and probably more besides that I’m forgetting. That’s an awful lot of leading ladies covering pretty much every angle of motherhood that you can imagine. In fact, one of the maxresdefaultreasons this movie fails is that it tries too hard. The script is just so stupidly earnest. It makes wonderful actresses say such flighty, cliched things. And everyone cries all the time, at the drop of a hat. It made me really wonder why the script writer has so many fucking hats, and why she’s always dropping them. Secure your hat to your head, lady.

Mira Sorvino. That’s who I was forgetting.

Anyway, are your tear ducts all clogged up? Do you have some salt water that needs purging? Were you hoping to remove one tiny strip of makeup all the way down your face? Then have I got a movie for you! Mothers and Daughters doesn’t just ask you to cry, it begs. The director probably owns stock in Kleenex. But it’s the kind of shame-crying that only makes you mad at your stupid emotions and the things that make you feel them. I watched this on Netflix at 2am, when it is perfectly acceptable to cry watching a movie you loathe as long as you have Doritos to keep you company.

The writing is ambitious, but ambitious in the way that a 19 year old writes a memoir. People will be so impressed when I use all my big words! I have a thesaurus and Irs_1024x759-160502103124-1024-courteney-cox-mothers-daughters.ls.5216 want you to watch me abuse it! I’m going to write a trite little movie that wishes it was a pretentious little novel! Script writing 101 says I should put in a conflict here! [Insert conflict]. I wonder if Sharon Stone can do polysyllabics? Either way she’ll be impressed when I whip out this tired metaphor! And I’ll make it super relatable by including a variety of white women with down-to-earth jobs like bra designer, fashion icon, and celebrity photographer. And I wonder if I can work in cancer? Watch out, heart strings!

In conclusion, Mothers and Daughters is a movie I found randomly on Netflix, having never heard of it before despite starring at least 3 Oscar-nominated actresses. It will be palatable to neither mothers nor daughters but it’s definitely a movie that exists. The end.

 

 

 

Night Owls

We’ve all been there: it’s late, she’s hot, you take her home even though she’s maybe a little crazy. The sex is good because that’s all there is. Dirty, nasty sex. Classic one night stand. Which is what Kevin thinks he’s doing with Madeline until their hook up turns into her suicide attempt, and he realizes he’s not at her house, he’s at his boss’s house, the one he shares with his wife and kids. Sooo….what the fuck?

smoke.pngBecause the plot necessitates it, he can’t call an ambulance in the name of “discretion.” I hate this movie less than 10 minutes in. I have 0% sympathy for 100% of the characters.

A highly qualified foot doctor shows up and slaps her back into consciousness, only to abandon his patient (and his Hippocratic oath), obligating Kevin to “keep her alive” through various contrived soul-baring, post-suicidal flirting sessions. I burst a blood vessel from rolling my eyes so goddamned much.

156 words to say: Not good. Not worth it. Bad bad bad. I could have used its 90 minute run time to drive to the dive bar down the street, make eyes at some loner on a barstool and had my own ill-fated one night stand, and even factoring in some disappointing sex and a persistent case of The Herp, I still might have come out ahead.

Suicide Squad

Anything I say about Suicide Squad needs to be weighed against the possibly discreditingbatman v superman fact that I liked Batman v. Superman. It was a mess, I’ll give you that. And a whole lot of it didn’t make a bit of sense, even by superhero standards. While there were at least a couple dozen things that I wish had been done completely differently, I walked out feeling exhilarated, as if I had just witnessed the start of something huge. And, for all that Marvel has done right, it’s never really produced a film (with the possible exception of Civil War, which hadn’t come out yet) that felt like such an event.

With Batman v. Superman, I was prepared for the worst. Even the trailers couldn’t hide some of the movie’s bigger problems. With Suicide Squad, which many had dared to hope would save the DC Extended Universe and put it back on the right track, the trailers were filled with bizarre and exciting images and I couldn’t wait to see how they fit into the larger story.

suicide squad 2By now you’ve probably read that a lot of people have felt let down by Suicide Squad. I was too. Its missteps aren’t as embarrassing as BvS’s were but its best moments weren’t as impressive either. Actually, while BvS ended with me feeling like I’d seen the biggest movie of the year, Suicide Squad ended with me wondering “Was that it?”.

Like in BvS, Suicide Squad has a lot to get done and a lot of characters to introduce and ten minutes in it becomes pretty clear that they have no idea what order to do it all in and just decided to throw scenes at you at random. This disorganization continues the whole way through.

As Harley Quinn, Margot Robbie steals every scene she’s in. Clearly insane and easy to suicide squad 1love, Quinn is the only character in the whole ensemble whose actions always make sense and Robbie is the only actor of the bunch who never makes a false move.

I’m a little less enthusiastic about the rest of the team. They include the ruthless hitman and unspoken group leader Deadshot (well, sort of a hybrid between Deadshot and Will Smith, played of course by Will Smith), Australian boomerang nut and notorious asshole Captain Boomerang (Jai Courtney), human flamethrower and recent pacifist El Diablo (Jay Hernandez), Reptilian cannibal Killer Croc (Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje), and rope specialist Slipknot (Adam Beach, who as the trailer suggests is barely in the movie). They don’t always come to life like they should but are at their best by far when they interact with each other. That’s the whole fun of the Suicide suicide squad 3Squad. Unfortunately, they don’t get nearly enough chance to just be themselves and play off one another. Like BvS, it’s far too interested in its needlessly complicated plot than it is in its characters.

Jared Leto’s Joker is the biggest disappointment. Not that it’s a bad performance. The Joker is every bit as menacing and captivating as he should be and Leto makes some very interesting choices but he’s barely in the movie and, when he is, his scenes are rarely relevant to the larger story. Leto’s take on the character never really gets a chance to resonate and deserved a film that used him better.

Suicide Squad has some terrific scenes and gets a lot of things right but overall it’s a missed opportunity to get the Extended Universe back on track. What’s worse, it doesn’t give much reason to hope it’ll get any better in future films.

Indignation

Indignation is a film that demands for you to digest it.  Feeling more like a novel than a typical movie (fitting since it’s based on a book), Indignation is a story about star-crossed young lovers that’s not quite a love story.  It’s also very slow and very talky, which is apt because that mirrors freshman Marcus’ approach to life.  Marcus is a wanna-be lawyer who decides to leave Newark to attend school in Ohio.   And not just anindignation-sundance-review-logan-lermany school in any Ohio, this is a Christian school in 1951 Ohio, where attending chapel services is a required part of the curriculum.

That requirement does not sit well with Marcus, because he’s not only from a Jewish family, he’s also an atheist.  Needless to say, he’s quite indignant about this whole thing, and he takes it so personally that you have to wonder why he thought attending this little Christian school was a good idea.  Perhaps it was the only school that offered him a scholarship?  Or maybe he just wanted to get as far away from the family butcher shop as possible.

Whatever brought him there, and despite his strenuous objection to the religious curriculum, he quickly warms to the school when he sees Olivia in his history class, and from there, a romance blooms.  Sort of.

This is going to sound very weird comi8-indignation-_05_2016-10_17_22ng from me, but I could have used a lot more romance than Indignation delivered.  I liked watching Marcus and Olivia deal with their issues.  It was a lot more real than what we usually get from romantic movies.  But too often, just as it was getting interesting between the pair, we’d cut to some other aspect of Marcus’ college life, seeing him ask important-sounding questions in class or arguing with the Dean or quarrelling with his two roommates.  Many of these other scenes halted the movie’s momentum without adding anything important, and as a result ended up feeling like unnecessary filler.

For anyone who has read the book (Jay?), I’d be interested in hearing whether you were more engaged by the parts of the movie that are just about Marcus, or whether they felt extraneous to you as well.

Even with that uneven momentum, there was a lot to like about Indignation and I would recommend it.  I particularly liked the film’s structure and the way the story was told.  Though it started slow, before too long Indignation engaged me and made me curious about where we would end up, especially once Marcus and Olivia met each other. I just wish the movie had been more focused on the two of them, but in the end, I got enough of their story to ensure that Indignation stuck in my head and made me think about fate and love and starry nights.

 

Tallulah

The last time Ellen Page and Allison Janney shared the (figurative) stage, it was in Juno: Page was the pregnant teen and Janney the surprisingly supporting stepmom. Now they’re reteamed in similarly maternal roles. Page plays a young drifter who kidnaps a baby, and Janney is the duped divorcee who believes herself to be a Grandma.

This is not a perfect movie by any means and yet you’re going to spend the next 4 minutes reading about its virtues. Why? Because this movie was written and directed by a woman Tallulah_Unit_00820R-1000x562(Sian Heder) and features three of the most complexly-written and -rendered female characters you’re going to see on the big (well small – it’s on Netflix) screen this year.

Although the movie goes through the obligatory police-crime drama, its focus is really on these 3 women and their relationship to the world. Tallulah and Margo in particular yearn to feel connected, to feel necessary to someone, but are terrified of what that means. To love so enormously is also to risk loss. Wanting to be needed can lead to feeling disposable. Carolyn, on the other hand (Tammy Blanchard), is the dismayed if distracted mother now missing one baby. Although her young child needs her very much, she neglects her in order to get those same feelings from a man. She ends up utterly alone – blamed, shamed, and full of regret.

The movie shifts tone rather abruptly – one minute Page and Janney are trading stiletto-sharp barbs, the next they’re unloading some Louis Vuitton-worthy emotional baggage. Page is a petite powerhouse and Janney an exceptionally talented opponent and the film is never better than when the two are struggling to find a path between their fierce independence and the need to show someone else their pain. Theirs is about as fucked up as a mother-daughter dynamic can get, but they come from such a real and honest place6840c860-4efc-11e6-86d5-59965f7b75f9_20160721_Tallulah_Dead you can’t help but be drawn in. I am so proud to tell you about a movie in which women are taking care of themselves, and taking care of each other, and finding strength, not weakness, in accepting help from others. It’s heartening, just fucking inspiring, to see women taking this leap on behalf of all of us: reach out. Connect. It’s scary and risky and worth it.

 

 

 

Editor’s note: this post was not intended as an endorsement of kidnapping. Back away from the baby.

Slash

Neil, a shy 15 year-old who is questioning his sexuality, has trouble connecting with his classmates until he meets Julia an out-spoken and rebellious 16 year-old. They may not seem to have much in common at first glance but they bond over their love of writing slash-fiction.

slash

Don’t worry if you don’t know what slash-fiction is, neither did I. Slash-fiction is basically like any online erotic fiction except it features characters from pre-established sci-fi or fantasy who would ordinarily not be naked together. Ever wondered what it would be like if Dumbledore and Gandalf had wizard sex? Someone’s thought about it, someone’s written about it, and that’s slash.

Neil’s got some real talent, although his limited life experience makes it hard for him to write sex convincingly, but he lacks the confidence to post it online. Julia, who’s already posted 38 raunchy stories about an elf named Fain, happens to accidentally get a peek at his work and sees potential. Mostly though, she believes that real writers want their work to be seen. So she encourages/pressures him to publish his stories as the two develop an unlikely friendship and a complicated mutual attraction. Hoping to participate in a live read for slash-fiction writers, they journey to ComicCon on a mission to sneak into the Adults Only event.

slash 2

I can’t endorse this well-intentioned indie as much as I’d like to. Quirkiness seems inevitable in a story like this but writer-director Clay Liford does his best to keep it grounded and believable. It’s a delicate balance that I’m not sure he ever got quite right. And, elf sex and space orgies aside, Slash doesn’t bring much new to the story of a lonely teenager coming of age.

That being said, I’d rather focus on what works. Lirod wisely resists the temptation to judge or mock a subculture that could have easily made easy targets. By respecting his characters, he gives them room to grow and, in most cases, doesn’t let a single trait define them. Mostly, it comes down to the casting. Michael Johnston, as Neil, seems a little one-note at first but grows on you, especially in his scenes with Julia. As Julia, Hannah Marks is quite a find. Her quick wit and outer confidence mask Julia’s hidden insecurities. She reminded me of a young Mary Elizabeth Wintead.

Slash isn’t the next Juno but if you are curious about sci-fi porn and wonder about the people who write it, you might find yourself charmed by this little film.

The Unseen

A mother calls a father, concerned. Teen-aged daughter Eva is acting strange: grades suck, dropping out of sports, hanging out instead of applying to college. Bob hasn’t seen her in a while but sends checks. His ex-wife Darlene (Camille Sullivan) thinks it’s time he re-involves himself.

It sounds like the makings of a family drama, but wait: a flicker. Of something strange. unseen_(4)Mysterious. Maybe a little…creepy? In an unguarded moment Bob (Aden Young) shows us his secret. Under layers of clothes and bandages, his flesh is disappearing.

In this modern retelling of The Invisible Man, it’s clear that Bob is suffering –  the physical pain leaving an ugly grimace on his face, the mental anguish evident in his isolated, tattered little life. His body’s disintegration mimics that of his family. Both  leave him feeling raw. But when his daughter Eva (Julia Sarah Stone) goes missing, Bob will do anything to find her, even it means partnering with criminals to finance the trip, even if it means exposing the closely-guarded secret of his descent into invisibility.

This is writer-director Geoff Redknap’s first feature film, but if anyone can handle this gritty horror thriller, it’s him. He’s best known for his special makeup effects work onunseen2 TV’s The X-Files, The Flash, and Fear The Walking Dead, and in movies like Watchmen, Deadpool, Warcraft, and the upcoming Star Trek Beyond, but that’s just a fraction of his IMDB credits. The list is so long and impressive that you might wonder where he found the time to make this move into writing and directing, but it’s clear that movies are his passion.

The Unseen is a tensely edited thriller with a sci-fi medical twist. Redknap’s makeup FX background puts the horror back into horrific; Bob’s wounds are bloody disgusting, almost gleefully so. But this movie doesn’t coast on gore alone – in fact, it’s got a solid story, is compellingly shot by cinematographer Stephen Maier, and is well-acted by the gruff Young. You don’t often see a debut feature so self-assured but Redknap’s arrival as both writer and director make it certain that this may be his first, but it won’t be his last.

 

Fantasia Film Fest: The Shorts

Crimson Dance: When the Assholes were recently in Las Vegas, we took in a burlesque show because how could we not? T&A are as much a part of Vegas as craps and CRIMSON_DANCE_TonyaKay_toes_by_JosephWirth.jpgcosmopolitans, and we’d already had plenty of those. We snuck upstairs at Harrah’s, where cowgirls get x-rated. They writhe on the hoods of pickup trucks, pop out of plaid blouses, and strip right down to their cowboy boots. It was fun, but it wasn’t burlesque. There’s more to burlesque than dancing and getting naked (not that I’m complaining). We’d done burlesque before, at a birthday party for Sean. There the ladies tantalized and teased – and even got Matt up on the stage to shake what his Moma gave him. Recently, Patricia Chica has shown me another side to burlesque. Let’s call it burlesque for a cause.

In her 3.5 minute short inspired by her mother’s leukemia, Chica reminds us of the importance blood plays in our lives. Sensual burlesque dancer Tonya Kay puts a twist on her stage show by being both very vital and alive in her performance while also reminding us of the very stuff that keeps us that way. It’s a provocative and thoughtful short that will no doubt burn memorable, and in its way, it serves as bold tribute to Chica’s mother.

 

Never Tear Us Apart: Holy shit. Sorry, I had a super fantabulous opening statement prepared but then all the thoughts fell out of my mind exactly like lost marbles while watching this short. It’s intended as ‘proof-of-concept’ which means it’s an example of the work they hope to do someday as a feature. It’s a great visual way to show prospective NTUA_head cut off.pngfinance people that they don’t just have a script on paper but the ideas and know-how to make a real movie. I don’t have $20 million dollars in my back pocket, or even in the front one, but director Sid Zanforlin’s got me convinced. First off, this is maybe the freshest idea for a horror movie that I’ve ever come across. The premise: What if a journey of self-discovery goes really wrong? A young man tracks down his long-lost grand-parents only to find they’re…murderous cannibals? There are elements of both horror and comedy even in a 6 minute short. The effects are top-notch and the cinematography is (sorry to say it) surprisingly good. This may be proof of concept, but it looks and feels like an expensive production. Nice work here. Won’t be surprised at all to see this movie in theatres one day.