You’ve likely heard about our trip to Disney World by now, and you may have even seen me in one of several Disney dresses. One dress that I did not buy was the Disney dog dress (praise be – yes, there IS such a thing!) and Sean was very disappointed in its exclusion. The dress featured so many of our favourite canine characters that I decided to dedicate a list to our furry friends – especially mine, who have been left home for the duration of our travels. Miss you love you see you soon!
10. Lady, Lady and the Tramp. This is a pure romantical addition to the list. Not only are she and her beau #couplesgoals, she inspires pure #hairenvy too. And she’s a dog! But dogs are better than people, and I’ve never had a date half as romantic as slurping noodles for two (though I likely have nosed a meatball onto my partner’s plate – don’t ask).
9. Pluto, various. Mickey Mouse has a pal named Goofy, who is an anthropomorphic dog. He wears clothes and walks upright and has fingers and speaks. Mickey also has a pet dog, and his name is Pluto. Pluto does none of the above. He’s all dog, mouse’s best friend. He’s adventurous and friendly, though prone to panic when encountering something unknown. Since he doesn’t talk, he relies on physical comedy, and those beloved bits have ensured him a place among the sensational six (Mickey, Minnie, Donald, Daisy, Goofy, Pluto) though Pluto rarely if EVER has a starring role. He proves yet again how well Disney does sidekicks.
8. Percy, Pocahontas. Percy the pug is the pampered sidekick to the evil Governor Radcliffe. Though the other sailors slop around below-decks, Percy lives a life of 
luxury, taking bubble baths and eating dog bones off a carousel. If only I lived so well! But once they land in America, Percy switches allegiances, befriending not just Pocahontas, but her animal friends as well – notably, a scampy raccoon named Meeko who is the real reason I’ve included Percy. Meeko is not a dog, but he may as well be. I think these are a beautiful inclusion because they do something their humans are unable to do: they put their differences aside and build a friendship. Dogs really are better than people.
luxury, taking bubble baths and eating dog bones off a carousel. If only I lived so well! But once they land in America, Percy switches allegiances, befriending not just Pocahontas, but her animal friends as well – notably, a scampy raccoon named Meeko who is the real reason I’ve included Percy. Meeko is not a dog, but he may as well be. I think these are a beautiful inclusion because they do something their humans are unable to do: they put their differences aside and build a friendship. Dogs really are better than people.7. Bolt, Bolt. Bolt is a white German shepherd and the star of a TV series about a canine super hero. But this work has led Bolt to believe that he is in fact a super hero though he is actually just an actor. However, that theory’s going to be put the test when he becomes separated from his owner and has to prove his mettle on his own and find his way home. It’s a very sweet story about self-discovery and self-worth, and the star is an adorable cartoon dog that you can’t help but love.
6. Sparky, Frankenweenie. Victor and his dog Sparky are incredibly close. When 
Sparky dies, Jay cries. That’s just how it is. We’ve only spent a few opening scenes with 11 year old Victor and his pal Sparky, but Sparky’s end is tragic, and we feel it deep in our bones. But Victor is a cunning, smart kid – and very interested in science. So he manages to resurrect his dog. Sparky lives again, even if he is a little worse for wear, a little Frankenstein’s monstery. I live with 4 dogs who are my little floofy loves, and it would destroy me should they pass before me. So this movie speaks to me. Loudly. And it’s just a great film.
Sparky dies, Jay cries. That’s just how it is. We’ve only spent a few opening scenes with 11 year old Victor and his pal Sparky, but Sparky’s end is tragic, and we feel it deep in our bones. But Victor is a cunning, smart kid – and very interested in science. So he manages to resurrect his dog. Sparky lives again, even if he is a little worse for wear, a little Frankenstein’s monstery. I live with 4 dogs who are my little floofy loves, and it would destroy me should they pass before me. So this movie speaks to me. Loudly. And it’s just a great film.5. Sultan (Footstool), Beauty and the Beast. Beauty and the Beast is a beautifully animated fairy tale with a problematic plot. If you’re worried about it on account of the whole kidnap-victim-stolkholm-syndrome-bestiality bit, you’re not wrong. But let me tell you about what also bothers me: an old lady visits a castle on a stormy night and begs to stay the night. When the prince refuses, she turns him into a beast and he has until the age of 21 to make someone fall in love with him in his hideous state. This old witch doesn’t just punish the guilty party though – she somehow feels justified in turning the entire service staff into household objects even though 
they’ve done nothing wrong, and leaves them that way – “ten long years we’ve been rusting” sings a chandelier. Record scratch. 10 years? That’s right. The prince was only 10 years old, home alone, a latchkey kid when a stranger knocked on his door one night. Probably his parents warned him to never, ever let a stranger into the house when they weren’t there just like mine and yours did. And for that sin he receives this cruel punishment? He spends his formative years completely isolated and disfigured and yet still has enough humanity, enough sensitivity to impress a haughty young bookworm named Belle? Astounding. Also noteworthy: his staff has also managed to remain in good humour. Especially the castle’s pet dog Sultan, who gets turned into a footstool. I love seeing that footstool bounce around in the snow. He relishes being “pet” but then rushes to provide foot support to his guests as well. He’s loyal and sweet, proving that the dog’s spirit is just as much alive as ever in the footstool – which is actually kind of a harrowing realization for everyone else, but let’s not dwell.
they’ve done nothing wrong, and leaves them that way – “ten long years we’ve been rusting” sings a chandelier. Record scratch. 10 years? That’s right. The prince was only 10 years old, home alone, a latchkey kid when a stranger knocked on his door one night. Probably his parents warned him to never, ever let a stranger into the house when they weren’t there just like mine and yours did. And for that sin he receives this cruel punishment? He spends his formative years completely isolated and disfigured and yet still has enough humanity, enough sensitivity to impress a haughty young bookworm named Belle? Astounding. Also noteworthy: his staff has also managed to remain in good humour. Especially the castle’s pet dog Sultan, who gets turned into a footstool. I love seeing that footstool bounce around in the snow. He relishes being “pet” but then rushes to provide foot support to his guests as well. He’s loyal and sweet, proving that the dog’s spirit is just as much alive as ever in the footstool – which is actually kind of a harrowing realization for everyone else, but let’s not dwell.
4. Dante, Coco. Dante is a skinny Xoloitzxuintle, a street dog when Miguel adopts him, and forever obsessed with food, which often gets him (and Miguel!) into embarrassing situations. But their bond means Dante will forever be loyal to Miguel and his clan; he even follows him into the land of the dead and becomes the world’s most adorably neon spirit guide. Though Dante appears to be a simple-minded goofball, he actually imperceptibly guides Miguel toward where he needs to be – “Who’s a good spirit guide? You are!”3. Slinky, Toy Story. Slinky dog is a friend to all toys, but seems especially loyal to Woody, and sometimes acts like his pet, which I suppose is fitting. He was voiced by
Jim Varney, who died of lung cancer shortly after Toy Story 2’s release; he has since been voiced by Varney’s friend, Blake Clark. In tribute, Slink’s catchphrase is “Golly bob-howdy” just like Ernest. Disney World has just opened up a new section of Hollywood Studios dedicated to Toy Story and one of its most popular attractions is the Slinky Dog Dash – which is a misleading way to describe a roller-coaster, if you ask me. Will I be too chicken to ride it? All signs point to yes.
2. Stitch, Lilo & Stitch. Technically, Stitch is an illegal alien science experiment (#626) 
gone wrong, not a dog. But when he’s exiled to Earth, he winds up in a dog pound, and adopts a more dog-like shape when he’s adopted by Lilo and her sister Noni. His nature is to destroy everything he touches, but when he becomes part of Lilo’s family, a valued and beloved pet, he changes in some essential ways. This movie is all about family, and a good reminder of a pet’s precious place in a family home.
gone wrong, not a dog. But when he’s exiled to Earth, he winds up in a dog pound, and adopts a more dog-like shape when he’s adopted by Lilo and her sister Noni. His nature is to destroy everything he touches, but when he becomes part of Lilo’s family, a valued and beloved pet, he changes in some essential ways. This movie is all about family, and a good reminder of a pet’s precious place in a family home.1. Dug, Up. Dug is a chubby golden retriever, loyal and silly and lovable. And easily 
distracted by squirrels! He likes people instantly, he bonds fiercely, and best of all, he talks! Rather, he wears a collar that decodes his thoughts into understandable English. And wouldn’t you just die to have that for your own pet at home? Dug is my favourite dog in my favourite movie, and everyone agrees: he was awarded the Palm Dog Award by the British film critics as the best canine performances at Cannes, beating out the fox from Antichrist, and the black poodle from Inglorious Basterds. I’ve already met Dug once, on a previous pilgrimage to Disney, and you bet I’m going to stand in line to do it again!
distracted by squirrels! He likes people instantly, he bonds fiercely, and best of all, he talks! Rather, he wears a collar that decodes his thoughts into understandable English. And wouldn’t you just die to have that for your own pet at home? Dug is my favourite dog in my favourite movie, and everyone agrees: he was awarded the Palm Dog Award by the British film critics as the best canine performances at Cannes, beating out the fox from Antichrist, and the black poodle from Inglorious Basterds. I’ve already met Dug once, on a previous pilgrimage to Disney, and you bet I’m going to stand in line to do it again!
outside the normal bounds of action thrillers, and I admire that, though I quickly lost my patience with his clumsy stabs at auteurism. And I don’t mean to imply that he shouldn’t have the opportunity to put his flashy mark on things, only that you have to have 110% of the talent and style to pull off such a ballsy attempt.
there. No, Dan Fogelman grows the concept to include generations that cross continents. The ensemble cast includes Antonio Banderas, Annette Bening, Olivia Cooke, Sergio Peris- Mencheta, Laia Costa, Alex Monner, Mandy Patinkin, and Jean Smart. Like his hit television show, Life Itself is not so much about the destination but the journey. Fogelman plays around with the chronology, as he does, and with an unreliable narrator and its delicious implications.
sometimes wonder if I prefer dogs to people, and I certainly do prefer my dogs to most people. I think dogs are so much better than we deserve. They are 100% heart. So it’s hard for me to imagine a bunch of dog owners so willing to sentence their dogs to a terrible, lonely, miserable life and death. Of the thousands (hundreds of thousands?) of dogs sent to live and die on Trash Island, only one is lucky enough to have an owner come looking for him – a 12 year old boy named Atari. When Atari becomes stranded on the island, a scruffy pack of dogs generously decides to help him find his beloved Spots. Duke (Jeff Goldblum), King (Bob Balaban), Rex (Ed Norton), Boss (Bill Murray), and even the reluctant Chief (Bryan Cranston) band together to reunite boy and dog on a journey that you might just say belongs in a Wes Anderson movie.
the book justice. And even happilier, the movie doesn’t suck, period, which was a major concern of mine. It seemed far too easy to just let it coast on its sentimentality. But while director Stephen Chbosky doesn’t have a lengthy track record to ease my worrisome nature, he does have one credit under his belt that’s all I really needed to hear: he adapted and directed
Anyway, as if a dog’s repeated death wasn’t enough to deter me, there was some controversy prior to the film’s release when a video of one of the actor dogs revealed it looking completely terrified during a stunt. Abuse was alleged, which led people to boycott the film. Not that it mattered; A Dog’s Purpose is not terribly good. It was never going to win the box office. It preys on your heartstrings. The director is so shamelessly over-sentimental that I felt like a dog on a leash being yanked along against my will.
passed from one weird owner to another. The film is more like 4 shorts that only have a dog in common. I didn’t even believe that it was the same wiener dog in all 4 vignettes. The first two are clearly linked, the last 2 not so much. The shorts also become increasingly non-entertaining. I thought the first one was the strongest: a father picks up a puppy for his young son, who has recently survived cancer. The dog sparks many serious conversations between mother (Julie Delpy) and son – motherhood, personality, free will, death. But all of the conversations are straight out of a what-not-to-say handbook, with Delpy literally telling her son that her childhood dog Croissant was raped by a dog with AIDS named Mohammed. The satire is delicious. There’s an explosion of joy on the screen as a boy and his dog play together, but this outburst of happiness is quickly punished, and the dog changes hands.
comfort, he’s not here to cushion the blow. And he’s sure as hell not here to give you a happy ending, so keep that in mind. Next up for Wiener Dog, she gets adopted by a character from another Todd Solondz movie, Welcome to the Dollhouse. Dawn is all grown up now, and played with Greta Gerwig. She runs into childhood…acquaintance (?) Brandon (Kieran Culkin) in a 7-11, and suddenly Wiener Dog’s on a road trip through some really heavy issues. She also meets disgruntled professor Danny DeVito and bitter old hag Ellen Burstyn. Through it all, Solondz’s camera is unflinching, perversely lingering over the gross and unbearable.
territory, the whole school would assemble into our tiny gym, and one of the few movies screened for us on a 24-inch TV was La guerre des tuques. It was a movie about a bunch of kids who wage an all-out snowball fight in the vicinity of a huge snow fort during their winter break. La guerre des tuques literally translates to war of the tuques, but the English version was called The Dog Who Stopped The War.
yes there are hockey sticks, but also lacrosse sticks and curling brooms.
ASSHOLES WATCHING MOVIES 